Parenting Articles

Actually, It Does Matter How You Give Birth

Whenever people discuss C-sections and natural childbirth, one well- meaning sentiment always rises from the fray: It doesn’t matter how you give birth, as long as your baby comes out healthy. I appreciate people wanting to remove...

What About the Baby?: The Dynamics of a Normal and Healthy Birth

On the physical level, birth happens naturally by a complex series of biological events believed to be initiated by the baby. When baby is ready, it is her biological priority to navigate down the birth canal with help from the contractions of the...

Co-Sleeping and Biological Imperatives

Why Human Babies Do Not and Should Not Sleep AloneWhere a baby sleeps is not as simple as current medical discourse and recommendations against co-sleeping in some western societies want it to be. And there is good reason why. I write to...

Communication and Connection

We live in an extremely behavior-focused society. From the moment our babies are born, people ask us about our baby’s behaviors and make judgments about whether our baby is good or bad based upon how much she inconveniences us as parents.

Transforming Anger

Among peace-loving folks, anger gets a bad rap. This is because anger is usually present when violence is committed. But anger is a form of energy that can be applied constructively, too. That was Nature’s intent. Anger arises n...

A Child's Innate Gifts

Each child is unique. Parents come to know their offspring as highly distinct individuals soon after birth. In part, that’s because babies arrive with traits and talents waiting in a raw state of potential. Young people have an inborn drive t...

Infant Needs and the On-Demand Life

On-demand services may have spoiled parenting—yes, by their very convenience. For example, we no longer have to plan our schedule around the airing of our favorite program or make efforts to record a particular show. With a few clicks, we can e...

Co-Sleeping Contributes to Optimal Brain Development

Like all mammals, humans have been sleeping alongside their babies for millions of years. Babies have an innate desire to stay in constant contact with their caregivers for survival. In most of the world, it’s still the norm for children to...

It Takes Two to Tantrum

When Toddlers Act Out, Parental Expectations are a Piece of the PuzzleMost of the time, when your child is having a tantrum, the episode is more accurately characterized as an interaction between the two of you. Generally, your...

Time In

The popular “time-out” behavior management technique is less harsh than traditional forms of discipline, but it’s still a punishment—like a mini jail sentence. Time-outs usually include a shame component as well (e.g., the “Naughty Chair”)....

Peeling the Onion

When I talk with my kids, I love sharing analogies of how the natural world is reflected in their bodies. One of my favorite ones is this: Your body is like an onion. Layers of experiences and responses build up: falls, injuries, positioning;...

Chiropractic Brings New Hope

I had a difficult pregnancy, difficult delivery, and then a baby that didn’t sleep. Lincoln was sick all the time—ear infections, upper respiratory infections, you name it. Just before his second birthday, he broke his leg. He ended up having a bon...

ADHD: More of It, Better Diagnosis, or Both?

“[Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders 5 (DSM-V)] is a wholesale imperial medicalization of normality that will trivialize mental disorder and lead to a deluge of unneeded medication treatment—a bonanza for the pharmaceutical ind...

After the Break-Up

Having a Positive Divorce is Up to You…But if You Have Kids, You’ll Have to Heal on Two Levels at OnceDivorce hits every aspect of your life. There is no escaping the waves of disbelief mixed with relief and terror and joy. It’s a very...

Ask What, Not How

As a play coach, I conduct workshops to help adults reconnect with the skills and perspectives that encourage play, which are often dormant in grown-ups. In one of my Remembering to Play events, a father shared that his young son expressed interest...

The Beauty of Fathering During Pregnancy: What Babies are Teaching Us

Our core understandings of babies and early human experience are in the midst of a fundamental paradigm shift. In my article “Consciousness at the Beginning of Life,” published in the previous issue of Pathways [Issue 57, Spring 2018], I...

How Kids Benefit from Real Responsibilities

Years ago, my two older kids, about 7 and 9 at the time, were getting ready to wash the floor. A neighbor girl knocked at the door, asking to play. When my son told her he was going to wash the floor first, she begged to be included. This girl had...

Competition VS. Creativity: Which "State" Do You Live In

We civilized folk seem to be addicted to competition—obsessed with who is the best and the worst, who has the most and the least, who are the winners and the losers. In our culture we habitually frame most everything in terms of conflict and...

5 Ways Partners Can Support Breastfeeding Moms (A Dad's Perspective)

When I read articles and stories about breastfeeding, I frequently come across the comment that breastfeeding leads to a diminished role for the dad. After all, if only Mom can feed the baby, how will Dad get a chance to bond with his child? This...

Safe to Explode: The Actual Reason Children are 800 Percent Worse When Their Mothers are in the Room

“They were fine all day with me, but the second they saw you, they lost it, Kate! I don’t understand!” My husband says this on a regular basis.